i am making some progress

fine

though slow...

paces blog

thanks for supporting, luves... am really proud to have met you girls in my life...

congrats to my mates who made another step forward... bumped into this site when i'm on call... pretty cool... http://pacesmrcpuk.blogspot.com

isn't it too much?

it fluctuates...

i think this is too much... this is way way way too much for her... for the past half a year she spent her time in hospital bed... it was hard to move her body... she wasn't even able to turn herself... and she got bedsores... for a short while she was better and happier... recently a TB effusion knocked her down again... she's so much weaker... she's too weak to talk... too weak to look at me... too weak even to swallow... though she's mentally sound she's thinking of something, she couldn't be bothered to tell me... each time i visited her she told me she's having a hard time... she's in pain here and there... like every mintue is long for her... this is suffering... too much suffering... she's been good all her life... i don't see why she get this at her eighties... being bed ridden is bad enough... why pain here and there... why six long months... stroke is horrible enough... why spine fracture why spinal cord infarct why tuberculosis why effusion...

please, don't make her suffer... keep her comfortable and pain free... am not asking for more... i know cannot ask for anything... it stabs my heart each day to see her, being her physician granddaughter whom she's loved all her life, knowing nothing much helps...

reunion dinner

here comes the rain

had a spectacular night with my luvliest groupmates... dinner in ye shanghai... food was just average or marginally below... given the venue and price, i expected much better food... service was fair... room and table were nice though... from now on i'll note places with round tables for 20... think i was right about a room... becoz we're so loud and it's not a good idea for our conversation to enter ears of others... and there's this little balcony for smokers, too... haha... the best bit was of course seeing the fab party of people and nearly all of them... superb... haha... well done bigbigtail... think i really enjoy doing this... organising reunion... sometimes i need to remind myself not everyone likes to meet old friends as much as i do... sometimes i think i'm bugging people to come... i genuinely love to see everyone though... so am really really glad that they have turned up tonight... thank you my luves...

there's been a bigger reunion plan in my mind... i don't have the guts to raise it yet... it'll be 10 years after high school graduation next year... it'd be fantastic if i could meet up with my high school buddies... must be lots of change and lots of funny stories to hear... a reunion for 200 is different from 20... i don't think i have the energy to do it... meanwhile am gonna keep it at the back of my mind...